Star Wars “Alternate” Universe?
Jawa Wawa Dippity Doo! I have another android for you!
When you tell me that you love me, I just say, ‘I know,’ and freeze…
Pardon me boy, but these are not the droids you’re looking for!
Yes, this is just a sample of a musical conversation I recently shared with my sons. We were discussing the possibilities of Disney’s ownership of Lucasfilm.
“What if the next three episodes are animated and musicals?!”
With the news of JJ Abrams getting the nod to direct and produce Episode VII, our concerns are relieved. Yes, the Force is with us all.
Our family loves Star Wars. We quote. We sing. We consider our Skywalker shirts to be “dressy.” Well, almost.
So it’s not unusual for us to have absurd conversations that revolve around the franchise. We joked about how the Empire and the Rebellion seemed to color-coordinated. Did the Emperor hire someone to keep the colors straight? Yes, we imagined a fashion designer ordering storm troopers around and organizing the right capes. We even employed a silly voice. (Think Fran Drescher meets Zsa Zsa Gabor.)
“Lando, darling, nobody knows if you’re a good guy or a villain. You will wear brown and blue—and definitely a cape. Yes, and keep that wonderful thick moustache. It’s like a black cape for your lips.”
We wandered into the realm of what-ifs. What if Chevy Chase had been cast as Han Solo? He still would have shot first, but it would have been an accident. Instead of tossing a coin to the Cantina owner, he would swipe a watch off Greedo’s wrist and toss it to the barkeep.
“It will probably smell like burnt frog for a few days, but this should cover the mess.”
I know it’s ridiculous. Don’t I have more important things about which I should talk to my boys? Maybe—maybe not. We’re talking—to each other. To me, that’s a pretty big deal.
That’s a wrap for this Toast to Cinema. Thanks for reading.